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Morning and Night

9:00am Why is it that you never get anyone who smells good sitting next to you on the subway? Seriously! Auntie Em was in full force this morning - that means it was windy- thank god for my new climate control hairspray. Although I could look like Edward Scissorhands right now and not know it. On my walk to the train there was an automobile altercation - this poor guy in a convertible PT cruiser who looked like that gay-- Omg wait I've got to share that I thought the smelly woman sitting next to me got up but it was the girl on the other side of me and to boot, guy with body odor just scooted over. Fml. Back to the PT cruiser gay Jay Leno intern and old lady screaming at him. This story is suddenly unappealing and I may barf from all these horrific scents so I just got up. Thank god my stop is next. Im also pulling that "Cool person" move on the subway where I dont hold onto any of the safety bars. *** 6:00pm This day has inspired me. Not only to write but I don't think I've ever felt so good inside about myself in 29 years. If you told me ten years ago id be working at a high profile law firm for high profile attorneys and kicking ass id probably laugh in your face. I had no guts, no confidence and wanted nothing to do with commuting into Manhattan. And it's not even so much that I love what I do to death. Its that im just good at everything I touch. (Except the violin). Excuse the overly confident swee. But she's been hiding it away for too long. In other words, I am so worth it. Worth every bit of awesomeness that comes my way. I can do anything I set my mind to. People like me, contrary to popular belief, and I am one marketable mother @#*$-. The change I made three months ago was the scariest decision I have ever made. It's done more than just improve my commute, its changed me, so much for the better, I cannot even describe. The people around me who have brought my level of confidence above the skyline I am so blessed for. And whether or not I receive the promotion I interviewed for today ill still feel this way. My manager still said fantastic things to me about myself and i'll just take that with me. I take only a little credit for this new me. Michelle Cast is the one everyone should thank. Day after day the last 11 years of our lives together she has done nothing but push me to do better for myself. Reminded me I was worth more than my present situation. Ripped up my roots, planted me where I deserved to be. That's what the perfect spouse is supposed to do right? Let me stop before u all begin to projectile vomit. This just might become a little too much happiness for anyone to read.

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